Category Archive

The Cancer Full Moon: 5 Cancer

Cancer 5:  A trap door under a rug.

“Descending through the layers into the places where every fear, every hope, every dream, every nightmare, every fantasy lives and lurks and seeks to play itself out. Magnetically drawn, against all survival instincts, to get in touch with the depths and tap into the secret places, right in the face of our own immense resistance to this process.

A trance of inward necessity. Almost mesmerized to go down under and confront what is to be met. Trauma and crystallization. The unearthing of that which we all prefer to sweep out of view. A nose for trouble, for chaos, for going where we’re not wanted. The shadow essence playing itself out either at levels of subconscious and unconscious compulsion or being entered upon willingly and daringly.

Sabotage of self and world is rarely considered useful or necessary. It seems to be perverse, wrongheaded, and really way off base. But the need is there and such tasks are not pleasant or reinforcing. However sometimes they come upon us from a depth that cannot be refused.

A consciousness given over to a certain curiosity and driving force of need to know. The investigator. The sleuth. The one who is implicated in all of it. The best example and the worst, all rolled in one, every bit of it inescapable.

The stage for this was set a long time ago. An agreement was made this time to let the truth be revealed anyway it needs to be. The contrast is binding. The only thing you can do is fulfill it with a certain humor as you observe the next twist.”

The Chiron Station: December 26, 2023 16 Aries

Aries 16:  Three sculptured birds: one black marble, one white marble, one solid gold.

                “Our soul is depth of feeling, brightness of thinking, and potential for a new kind of will to enact itself through us. But first we are meant to journey far under into the emotional depths and to engage heavily in the mind’s wanderings, to see where these take us.

The darker feeling spaces are compelling, liberating, and corrosive. We are placed firmly down inside our multiple responses and reactions to outer life and its dramas. Many of these fragments are habitual, frenzied, and turbulent. We rake ourselves through the coals, for we are unconsciously intent upon losing ourselves very fully in the spaces of self-negation and having very little direction or sense of purpose. When we are most deeply under these layers, we do a great imitation of being far gone, no way back.

The mind looks very good when we have labored under chaotic emotion for awhile. We rise into the clear open spaces of our objective intelligence. Now we have a handle on our lives. We know how to operate, how to keep everything in front of us, how to impress others. Best of all, we are released for a time from the grip of the depths and left to float free upon the outer surface. We can be brilliant at taking fullest advantage of this cycle of coming into the powers and the marvels of the outer mind.

The core will that seeks to come through us awaits the exhaustion of both avenues of escape. What then arises is a superlative, tremendously wide-open gift for grounding and focusing through us the longings, the activities and exploratory range of humanity emerging into our own true destiny path. We center upon free deeds, acts of will in a dedicated, surrendered sense. For our will is at one with the collective destiny so profoundly that we can, if we will, help to carry everybody forward with humility and passionate intent.”

Mercury Retrograde Mars New cycle (1 of 2) December 27, 2023 –  25 Sagittarius

  Sagittarius 25:  A small boat with no one in it, it is gradually drifting out to sea.

“The collective seas are vast and unquenchable. We are tapped by them to merge within them and to bear their energies and awareness’ everywhere we go. We give ourselves over to what is asked and demanded. We become drifters inside a great sea of impressions, taken over by whatever we put our attention on.

This can mean a great release from previous cycles, where the pressure and the build-up were too intense. It can mean preparation for later cycles, where we need to come to things from an empty, open place. And it can mean dreaming through this lifetime, in a cross between escapism and something fertile and beautiful being born.

Any way you shake it, this is all about letting go, about becoming one with the whole in a passive dreamy sense. It can feel so good to be able to give away your cares and woes and melt into the void, the vastness, the universal all. In fact, this can be addictive, too good to pass up.

However, this is a deep-down instinct at work here. This is not aimless and casual. We need to at various points become cleansed of ourselves and free of who we’ve ever been. And when this impulse is strong, the mystic glow, the magical power, the intimate passion of great self-release is active and alive on its own free terms.

The missing self inside this boat is there on the inner, in the spirit realms. They are watching the scene unfold. What will fate bring? Can the collective bring up on a far shore the one who longs for freedom? Is the adventure still good, still wide open?”

Scorpio 21   A pair of glasses with no lenses in them.

We can see whatever we need to see without any help from anybody else or any secondhand opinions, points of view, rumors going around. We don’t want to be influenced by apparent and seductive ways to impose models, ideals, standards. We want life rough, direct, strictly our way.

Because we are so utterly intent upon carrying through with this uncharted perception, this unmediated awareness, we will do exactly what we set out to do. Instead of making peace with the broader collective versions of what goes on around here, we will stick to our guns and face the consequences of being so adamant and relentless.

The strength we gather from being so authentic to ourselves is tremendous. We get to see straight and to be so on fire with our truth that our inward soul can manifest in action and in life the way we feel it and know it to be. There are no filters, no go-betweens at all. Few can be this starkly on with core awareness in these times.

The dilemma we face arises whenever we need to see how others view life or somebody else needs to see as we do through us. There is no verbal and no ready made tool to convey or translate between this interior gaze and anybody else’s version. Usually, we become isolated, set apart to such an extent that we become a law unto ourselves.

Yet in balance this is the way it has to be. Even if we get swept away with ourselves that is the path we must follow, in order to break through to original, innovative discoveries which arise in this fashion and not in any usual tracks. We have our priorities clear. The only thing to do is keep on with our intense obsessional track and let it become either a failed mutation, as most are, or one of those rare openings into a whole new way of seeing, understanding, and being with the truth, the bare stark reality. We risk everything for the chance to be crazy enough to see through every disguise and makeup right on time.

Here is Ellias Lonsdale’s meditation on the the Scorpio New Moon degree, reprinted with the author’s permission from his book 360 Degrees of Your Star Destiny

These are reprinted with the author’s permission from his book 360 Degrees of your Star Destiny.

21 Libra: The Ring of Fire Solar Eclipse

Libra 21 A magician wearing a live snake for a belt

He dabbles in those arts which bring the world alive. For he is perpetually trying them on for size. He gets drawn back into the common syndromes with every Out Breath. And then again he finds himself freed up in the In Breath to be the regenerator, the far explorer, the innovative self-conceiver.

He is washed by waves, back and forth, in and out. One side of him cannot bear to be so different, so strange, so other. Another side of him craves to enter upon deeper territory and restore his remembrances of who he is and why he is here. Both sides are pulling him apart. Yet he uses this edge to full advantage. He needs to be polarically drawn and repulsed. That’s how he grows and gets to know himself.

This one has a tremendous struggle on his hands. He already contains within him all of the basic equipment needed to form and shape a new world into being. And most especially, he has this knack of making the right connections, being where it counts, stepping into the shoes of an ancient self despite himself.

But it doesn’t stop there. He has gathered in his travels a massive load of self-discounting. He has learned to be as far away from himself as he can ever be. And the side of himself that is conditioned and programmed to be nice, to be good, to fit in will not give way. It is so intent upon popularity, success, and all those good things.

Perhaps he will never resolve these polarities and this strife. Or if he’s really fortunate and deeply graced, he will be drawn to restore his original personal self on it’s own ecstatic terms. And then he will discover that he contains the most vital quickening element that exists in the Earth, just waiting to be tapped boldly without inhibitions.

28 Capricorn: Pluto Turns Direct

Capricorn 28  A mirror covered with a fine film of dust

Seeing through a glass darkly. Remembering the way it’s always been. Consciousness glued to the scene of past visions, old cycles, everything that has gone on previously and seems to be repeating itself all over again.

Doubt coloring all perceptions. Self-judgment hounding the viewer. A bias against the self and all its old familiar worlds and those who people those worlds. Suspicion. Seeing the worst, looking for flaws.

An introspective frequency. So many inner voices saying, “this is what you’re like,” “there it is again.” Susceptibility to the influences of negative opinion, belief, assumption.

Yet the need here is to constellate all this, to work it out. The self is given over to a greater task. This involves the collective purging of ghosts. The self takes these things on as it’s own. But the burden of responsibility lies with us all.

It is a reckoning, a calling up of shadows, a bearing of the soul. It is the clearing of the ancient decks. Sometimes it gets tangled up in these wastelands. For it is so fascinating and compelling to be in on the bad news that we have all been so very lost for so long.

The task is graphic and explicit. Take on and take up all the under stuff, see it through and be done with it. The hardest part is to be done with it. We get caught in the cycles and keep on looking in that rear view mirror.

There is an awakening possible amidst this shadow task and its endless ripples. We come to realize that we can release any and all blame, as we see the whole picture and cease demanding that it should have been otherwise. All is as it needs to be.

  Virgo 9  A man mixing cement

                Making sure that the world around us is safe, steady, is secure. Working hard to form a life that holds together under duress. Being concerned with what can go wrong, and how to head it off before it happens. Planning ahead. Seeing every possible problem, contingency, likelihood. Intent upon staying on top of things and not being so very foolish.

                The mentality of working against our own inherent nature. Having glimpsed the fact that we are likely to do anything, given half the chance, we tend to decide rationally that we must control ourselves and generate lots of safeguards around our own unpredictable whims and endless personal vagrancy’s.

                The witnessing intelligence working overtime to outwit pure inventive genius and its soundly errant ways. But perhaps it doesn’t work. We try and we try to second guess and check it out and do the right thing. It can be that the wild child outwits the steady-eyed grown up, the feelings show up through the cracks and the mind can’t keep them firmly under.

                Then we enter upon a radically different life current. We may discover that this impish, lawless, irrepressible spark is not something to be ashamed of, or wipe away the traces of, or clean up after. We begin to merge within our own strange, fascinating genius.

                It can turn out that he is our salvation. For he has this one pivotal characteristic which redeems him and makes him worth working with, whatever it takes. He is able to cut right through every possible form, style, and appearance, to reveal the hidden truth in a way that vastly enriches our shared reality.

                It is not easy to bear a completely lawless force inside. But it is hardest to go against it, most natural to at last say Yes.

Here is Ellias Lonsdale’s meditation on the Virgo Wormhole/ new Moon cycle, reprinted with the author’s permission from his book 360 Degrees of Your Star Destiny