Written by Jan Finley
In our life long journey of transformation and growth, we occasionally hit road blocks that threaten to derail us, as old wounds from our past resurface. Recently, this happened to me.
I found myself sliding down a dark rabbit hole, one I have travelled before more than once. One I had faced, owned, worked through and was at peace with. And then abruptly, all that I knew to be true flew out the window and I huddled in the dark. In this dark place, my fear manifested as back to back migraines, rendering me incapable of doing anything more than lying in stillness, alone with my thoughts. Fearing regression, fearing I had failed to learn this lesson, I shut down completely, landing squarely in judgment and abysmal fear.
Over these many years I have learned to trust in my Higher Self and its magnificent inner guidance. As my headache began to recede, I was able to gather myself and begin to listen. I began to channel. Oftentimes, in situations like this, I hear or read messages that provide insight. Words spoken on the tv, words read in a book provide clarity and this time was no different. I was able to see from a higher perspective exactly how and when this pattern of belief was created and how it underscored most of my earlier life. I was able to see how far I have come in my own personal growth and I rejoiced in that. I saw how some lingering fear still held me hostage and separate. My guides reminded me of the power I hold to change how I perceive the world around me and how I perceive myself. Judgment toward myself softened into love and acceptance. Looking back on it now that I have moved through the barrier of self doubt and fear, I can see it as the magnificent lesson that it was, almost Yoda-esque in the inner teaching I received and the opening I experienced.
And so I was told:
As a wise teacher once said, “Do or do not. There is no try.” The decision is yours. We would ask you if you truly want to have fear dictate the terms of your existence…for that is what you are doing.
Do not mistake feeling stuck for a permanent condition. It is mindset only and like all beliefs can be changed at will.
Consider allowing rather than forcing and judging. We are here, will always be here, with you. Your judgment and fear causes restriction which shuts down your ability for flow and allow. Breathe. Release. Write.
The simple answer lies within the breath. Inhale. Hold. Exhale. Hold. Repeat. In that simple yet vitally important act, life continues for all. Coming together. Letting go. Coming together again. If one were to speed the coming together and letting go speed up, they would blur together so that the individual steps would disappear. This then is the secret. Everything that exists is One. One’s perception of the One creates separation and division. The human mind must, in essence, slow it down in order to perceive it.
This becomes an endless repetition, layer after layer, that creates the ages. The inhales creates, the following held breath embraces accomplishment, the exhale dissolves and the next held breath creates incoming change. Repeat. The process is slowed in human life to such an extent that it becomes harder to observe and acknowledge. Slow or fast, it is still and always One.
There is little to be gained from holding yourself separate. You punish only yourself. Do you truly want to experience less joy and delight because you have decided to limit your exposure to what you perceive as rejection? We would suggest to you that what you experience as rejection is actually your own self imposed isolation. While developed to protect you, it only serves to imprison you.
Live fully. Love fully. Be fully. This is your life to create as you will. Create carefully and thoughtfully from your Heart. Fear has no place in creation. And finally, we urge you to remember that revisiting lessons from the past is not a judgment or a notice of failure. It is an opportunity to observe growth and perhaps learn something new that allows you to expand even more. Learning and growing never stops. Be open and allow. Allow all of you to Be.
“Out of acceptance comes wisdom. Not an acquirement wisdom is, not information. This quality of tremendous acceptance is wisdom.”
Yoda
“We are not here to live a flawless life.
We’re here to feel it, break it open,
& make the best of what we find inside.
You are allowed to start over as
many times as you need.”
The Sattva Life